9.29.2009

It's Not Just Crystallized Intelligence...

...and it's not just Fluid, either.
--

Here I sit...
In my black t-shirt, hot pink dance capris, tights and socks, my converse on the floor beside me, and my hair up in a ponytail with that bothersome, single lock of hair that is constantly falling to the middle of my forehead.

Here I sit...
At my desk, in my dorm room. The laptop sitting on my stuffed and satisfied calender, full of happenings and events. The lamp is standing in the corner, shining it's watery light down on my fingertips as they stroke the keyboard swiftly. It balances on a small stack of books with a letter to a friend leaning against it.

Here I sit...
My psychology textbook by my right hand, along with my math workbook and binder. To my left is my agenda, full of plans, ideas, quotes, assignments and dates.

Here I am, a college student. A daughter. A friend. A conqueror. A survivor. A believer. A dancer. A dreamer. A warrior. A worker. A peacemaker. A poet. A linguist. A writer. A friend.
Alive
.

And while I'm excited for what is to come, I'm not ashamed to admit that I'm a little bit afraid of change. What I've known has been so good...How could I know what the future holds? Why would I ever want to leave where I was?

But it's already happening on it's own. And if I don't move forward, I'll never know what could have been. If I stay where I am, I'll never know how good it could get.

And I want adventure.

So I will trust. And I will rest assured that my God is with me wherever I go. He will never leave me nor forsake me. He knows the plans and as I acknowledge Him, He will direct my paths and make them straight. Or if there are any bumps along the way, I won't mind. I'll know I'm headed in the right direction.

It's like Pastor Don once said,
"If you go forward, you may lose a little.
If you stay where you are, you will lose a lot more.
If you go back, you'll lose everything."

I choose Jesus.
I choose Life.

So in the words of a good friend of mine:
I travel on.

2 comments:

Pretty Lady said...

travel on, my friend

Kevin AegisAvantGarde said...

What we know may be good. Where we are. But as C.S. Lewis said, we really do feel, deep within our incomprehensible dreams, that what we yearn for is something which doesnt belong to this world. It is precisely the search for this New World (Olam Haba) which not only moves us on to new horizons but makes us search within the legacy of what is written and revealed the path which may lead to this Place.

Our pilgrimage will take us through so many different countries, people, situations, such that after trodding through this wonderful world we realize that the path to this World we yearn is actually within ourselves. Moreover, that this Heaven we search for, only hinted at in our dreams, is not a Place which exists beforehand but that it is an non-temporal construction inside our heart, built from the meritful actions, peace of mind, the good memories and even more, of the people we trully loved.

We dont even suspect that this path of Justice and Honesty (of the Tzade) which takes us closer to Him gradually turns into a real New World accesible in certain moments. That after this path of peace, which are the ways of the Just (Tzadik) gradually turns into the Path of Wonder. When we find this place within ourselves we will know what Yeshvah meant when He said that His Kingdom wasnt of this world. There IS another world accesible only through our good actions and through our love towards one another and the Universe.

Till we arrive at this place, travel on, travel within yourself.

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