tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59585457851332392302024-03-05T17:22:55.366-04:00Inescapable AwarenessBrittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.comBlogger64125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-15481717129597147262015-09-24T18:36:00.002-04:002018-09-27T16:43:58.175-04:00The Story Hasn't Ended<div style="text-align: left;">
It has been three years. </div>
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Which is, frankly, unbelievable. </div>
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Since my last entry in 2012:</div>
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I have graduated with a Bachelor's in Theology and a minor in English.</div>
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I have moved to FL, back to SC, and back to FL again. </div>
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And, most importantly, I got married. (Happily since 1.4.14!)</div>
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I was inspired to "turn the pages" on my virtual journals (aka blogs) this morning. Something I do from time to time to revisit and remember. The good and the bad are zoomed out in particular view. It builds a huge amount of gratitude in my heart to see the "lovely traces" of God's grace interwoven throughout my life.</div>
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<i>“By keeping a record of my experiences, I live my life twice over. The past returns to me. The future is always with me.” -Eugène Delacroix</i></div>
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But imagine my utter distress when I found out that one blog might be totally gone and the other inaccessible! If we should thank anyone for this post... it would be my mom. I wouldn't have been able to sign back in to either blog without her help. She saved two journals for me today!</div>
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I came to write... not to start all over again and revive this blog, but to say that the story isn't over. </div>
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This blog is really just one of my journals. </div>
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It had it's purpose, intermingled with a unique flavor and style bespoken of the time it was written in. <br />
And now we have reached the last page.</div>
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I want to thank everyone who ever read this blog and made my day with a comment or two. I really appreciate your support and feedback. It still cracks me up that my most viewed post ever is the Dirty Mop Water one. Ha! (If you're curious what that entry could entail, you can<span style="background-color: white;"> <a href="http://brisni.blogspot.com/2008/06/dirty-mop-water.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">click here</span></a></span> for that.)</div>
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For those who are wandering through by old paths or curiosity... thanks for stopping by. Feel free to flit through these pages. I hope some of the words I have written are meaningful and encouraging to you. I know I'll be back to read them for myself from time to time.</div>
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As for my current story... you can see that <a href="http://www.instagram.com/brisnibythesea" target="_blank"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">here</span></a>. ˂˂˂</div>
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This blog started with a fiery <span style="color: #3d85c6;"><a href="http://brisni.blogspot.com/2007/11/coming-soon.html">warning</a>. </span>It spans five years and entails my last two full years in the Dominican Republic, and ends somewhere during my first two years of college. Significant transitions, so much learning. And it is fitting to close it with.... what? I never know how to end my journals, except with a prayer. It seems to me that the Only One deserving of the final note is the Man who saved my soul.<br />
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<i>Jesus, I have learned so much, yet I still know so little. You are teaching me day by day how important community is. Doing life in intimate honesty with those around me, learning to love more and more, to use my time on this earth wisely... And yet, foremost, I am always and ever coming back to the fact that it is all </i><b><i>hinged</i> </b><i>on my relationship with You. It is meaningless apart from You. This isn't some melodramatic, sappy, puppy-love kind of "meaningless apart from You" -- this is life and death. It is the truth. I need You in my life. Your love is better than the sweetest wine. Your faithfulness is unfailing. Your patience, unwavering. Your goodness, untiring. Your kindness, I know, is how I've made it this far. And I'm so thankful that you watch my steps - though I stumble, I will not fall, for You are holding my hand. (Psalm 37-23-24) Thank You for inspiring me to write. I pray that You might use it for Your glory.</i><br />
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<i><br /></i>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-69022770946839073642012-11-13T12:42:00.000-04:002012-11-15T02:42:48.991-04:00Two Kinds of Light<br />
There is a saying:<br />
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<i>“I have but one candle of life to burn, </i></div>
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<i>and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness </i></div>
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<i>than in a land flooded with light.”</i></div>
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But what if the land is flooded with artificial light?<br />
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Today in chapel, the speaker encouraged us to be salt and light, based on a passage of Scripture in Matthew 5:13-16. He explained the salt makes people thirsty. That light allows us to see, causes growth and is used best in the darkness.<br />
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But he had a picture of a flashlight on the screen. And all of the sudden I got to wondering about the "causes growth" idea. What is the difference between light produced by the Sun and light produced by electricity?<br />
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Artificial light cannot make plants grow.<br />
There's something <i>different</i> about light that comes from the Sun, there's something else to it. Both produce light... but only the light from the Sun can produce life.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="st">© <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/missbeautyfull/4835005394/in/photostream" target="_blank">Ashley Santiago</a></span></td></tr>
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The quote at the beginning is an encouragement to do missions work. In a land where there is plenty opportunity to be exposed to light, the call is to go where there is only darkness, that the small light of my life would be used to its greatest capacity, where it shines brightest.<br />
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But may I be so bold as to say that artificial light could be even more dangerous than the darkness? Because the darkness is certainly not able to deny the presence of light... but artificial light has the <i>semblance</i> of true light. In 2 Corinthians 11:14 it says, "Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light." But we know the enemy comes only to steal, kill and destroy. Jesus, however, came to bring life. [John 10:10]<br />
I am amazed by those who are called to the land flooded with artificial
light. It is a noble and hard calling. It looks crazy! Those with
artificial light shrug their shoulders and claim to have the same
thing... but they cannot grow. There is no <i>life</i>.<br />
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So would I <i>rather</i> (as the quote says) use the candle of my life to shine in the dark places? Honestly, yes! Even if its a primal, cannibalistic culture, my light would shine true with acute contrast to the darkness. The difference is seen.
It is something truly brave to take on a land flooded with artificial light... whatever that looks like. Because it could seem a waste. Your light doesn't seem as bright. It doesn't seem to make a difference.<br />
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But friends, do not be discouraged! Our little light is always of use because it comes from the Son! It's the real thing! Even in a land of artificial light, there will be a very distinct difference: only light from the Son can produce <i>life</i>.<br />
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And how are we that light? How are we salt?<br />
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"<i>In this world we are like Jesus</i>..." - 1 John 4:17<br />
We are called to be ambassadors of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20-21), representing Him. And how did He say people would know we are His? That we are His disciples?<br />
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"A new command I give you:<b> Love one another. </b>As I have loved you, so you must love one another. <i>By this all men will know that you are my disciples,</i> <u>if you love one another</u>." </div>
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- John 13:35 </div>
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"This is the message you heard from the beginning: <b>We should love one another</b>... <i> </i><br />
<i>This is how we know what love is</i>: Jesus Christ laid down his life. And we ought to lay down our lives... If anyone has material possessions and sees someone in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but <u>with actions and in truth</u>."<br />
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- 1 John 3: 11,16-18 </div>
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"<i>Who is it that overcomes the world? </i><br />
Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God." </div>
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- 1 John 5:5 </div>
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"<b>If you love Me you will obey My commands</b>." <br />
- John 14:15, 1 John 5:2-3<br />
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And
that love looks like<i> joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness and self-control</i>. It looks like <u>trusting</u>,
persevering, keeping no record of wrongs, rejoicing in truth... not
boasting, envying or being proud. It is full of<b> faith </b>and<b> hope</b>, and <i>it never fails</i>. And it is not by our own strength, but <u>as we live by the Spirit</u>. His light shining through us.</div>
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Mark 9:50; Galatians 5:13-26, 6:10; 1 Corinthians 13 </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-wrDLpXEu0LoGCAoUEMPtnllP2_XxA0DxU8UuZTPEFBwzvotfAt0xMArIG4u_pMynRKBwakMV7YniUIot3qBLazkXXN-OTu-JdSQB96F7wjpPGYOY7cULnbsTuGwuVw1PGBSZ6aXhnubS/s1600/AshStgo1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-wrDLpXEu0LoGCAoUEMPtnllP2_XxA0DxU8UuZTPEFBwzvotfAt0xMArIG4u_pMynRKBwakMV7YniUIot3qBLazkXXN-OTu-JdSQB96F7wjpPGYOY7cULnbsTuGwuVw1PGBSZ6aXhnubS/s400/AshStgo1.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="st">© <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/missbeautyfull/7729126866/in/photostream" target="_blank">Ashley Santiago</a></span></td></tr>
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Where you are now is where you are called to be faithful to the task at
hand. </div>
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Whether surrounded by darkness or artificial light, there is only
one True Light, of which we are witnesses. </div>
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Our war is waged in love.<br />
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<br />Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-76643459910433512392012-04-12T02:18:00.005-04:002012-04-12T11:01:08.519-04:00Renovation to RenewalIt seems this renovation of my heart and mind has been going on for quite some time now... and may it never stop until it's finished.<br />
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On the one hand, I feel as if I owe some sort of explanation for my lack of posting in several months. On the other hand, I don't really have to justify it at all. Still, I suppose it is worth noting that any inconsistency seen here could be related to the inconsistency within my own life. I had a sinking suspicion that my lack of writing as of late (not just here but in my own journals) has been due to some issue that needs to be taken care of within me.<br />
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Perhaps to some, this lack of writing for a few months (or sparsely writing for the last six months) is not really a big deal. But I have kept a journal since I was in kindergarten. So, not writing is pretty much a red flag in my book.<br />
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However, my lack of writing <i>could </i>be attributed to the fact that I have been swamped with school work this past year... in which I have written well over 75,000 words. To put that another way, if I took all the assignments I've written for my classes, I could make a 300 page book. An appreciable accomplishment, I think. Of course, the semester isn't over yet... so I might add a few dozen pages yet to that book.<br />
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Gracious, with that in mind, I don't really feel bad at all for not writing here. In fact, you <i>still </i>might not hear from me consistently... it all depends really. I could probably get rid of a few things that tend to take up my time. Trash my phone... But, of course, I need to be realistic. Or maybe I don't?<br />
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God is currently teaching me that it's not just about prioritizing Him. It's not a list with Jesus at the top as Number One. No, as a friend put it, He is <i>Alpha and Omega,</i> the beginning and the end. He is not just number one, He is the <i>Only One</i>. My entire heart and life devoted completely and wholly to Him... out of which the rest of my life flows.<br />
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Whatever <i>that</i> looks like...<br><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-48343755199916710822012-04-08T23:59:00.001-04:002012-04-09T02:11:25.780-04:00It is Finished!<br><br>In the heat of early morning on a hill<br />
They call The Skull<br />
The roaring of the angry mob<br />
Had settled to a lull<br />
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All eyes were cast upon the man<br />
Whose hands and feet were bound<br />
They saw Him cry in anguish<br />
When they heard the hammer pound<br />
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They saw the bloody woven thorns with<br />
Which His head was crowned<br />
They watched the bloody cross of wood<br />
Be dropped into the ground<br />
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The soldiers gambled for His clothes<br />
They watched them win and lose<br />
They saw the sign above His head<br />
That said "King of the Jews"<br />
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They searched His face for anger<br />
For vengeance in His stare<br />
Instead of eyes that burned with hate<br />
A look of love was there<br />
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He prayed for their forgiveness<br />
And bowed His battered head<br />
And no one knew the meaning<br />
Of the final words He said<br />
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It is finished<br />
And the sky grew black as the night<br />
It is finished<br />
And the people scattered in fright<br />
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The work had been done<br />
Redemption had been won<br />
The war was over without a fight<br />
It is finished<br />
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The provision has been made<br />
The foundation has been laid<br />
He paid the ransom due<br />
And tore the temple veil in two<br />
And opened up the way<br />
For me and you<br />
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It is finished!<br />
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-=-<br />
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---> [<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=john19-20&version=NIV" target="_blank">John 19-20</a>] <---<br />
"...These are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in His name." <br />
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<div style="text-align: right;">(lyrics by Petra, "It is Finished")</div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-22844991872453507802011-09-28T21:03:00.001-04:002011-09-28T22:24:30.844-04:00Renovation of the Heart and Mind(and maybe a little on the blog as well, as you may have noticed)<br />
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Many of you know that if I haven't posted in awhile, it's usually because: <br />
[a] I haven't anything (complete) to say worth writing or reading<br />
[b] I've been procrastinating<br />
[c] I'm learning something<br />
[d] A little of all the above.<br />
In this case, I would circle "d". I usually write when there's something I want to say... And I haven't pieced all the puzzle together yet, but I'm starting to see the picture fill in. A friend encouraged me recently to blog about what He is doing... in me and the world. No easy task, but here I am.<br />
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For now I think I'll have to stick with the former. I can't claim to know what He IS doing specifically, only what I know He does and plans to do. I do know that for the world He works to bring new life. That is His mission.<br />
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Jesus, the "Resurrection and Life" (John 11:25) said:</div><div style="text-align: center;">"I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. <i>I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.</i> I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep." - [John 10:9-11]</div><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> I have been learning so much. And it seems I learn in trends. By trends, I mean that one topic is in focus for quite some time, then it shifts to another topic that is enriched by the first topic. But in the meantime, the second topic also sheds light on the first. They are part of a trend.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The recent trend has been love.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Out of this has come ponderings and realizations concerning the importance and significance of love. God's love. You see why I haven't had anything to write? How can I even begin to scratch the surface on this topic? And what could be more important to correctly convey? What I'm beginning to realize more and more is how much it all depends on this. <i>This</i> is at the center. It's Him. <b>His love is not just part of Him, <i>He is His love.</i> </b>[<a href="http://www.esvbible.org/search/1+john+4%3A16/">1 John 4:16</a>]<br />
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So what is this doing in me?<br />
My focus has been rooted to these verses:<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?”</div><div style="text-align: center;">And [Jesus] said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. This is the great and first commandment. And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” -[<a href="http://www.esvbible.org/search/matthew+34-40/">Matthew 22:36-40</a>] </div><br />
When Jesus said this, it might be a little confusing to us who think of the commandments as the "big 10" found in Exodus 20. Neither one of these seems to be found in the Ten Commandments. However, to the Pharisees, this was incredibly significant. See, the Jews read the Torah, which is the first five books of the Bible. This is the Law that Jesus was referring to, and within it are 613 commandments. Yeah, that's a lot more than 10. So, out of these commandments, which did Jesus think was the greatest? It was really a trick question. (You can check out the reference to see that.) They were trying to trip Him up.<br />
They didn't expect Jesus to say what He did. He quoted to them something very familiar... something that is still the foundational creed of Judaism today. It is called the Shema. It comes out of <a href="http://www.esvbible.org/search/deut+6%3A4-9/">Deuteronomy chapter 6</a>:<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. <i>You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.</i> And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."</div><br />
As you can see, this was quite a big deal. And to this, Jesus added that the second greatest commandment is to "love your neighbor as yourself." - [<a href="http://www.esvbible.org/search/lev+19%3A18/">Leviticus 19:18</a>] He said that this commandment was like the first. In other words, it connects with what John said in 1 John 4:16.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">"So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him."</div><br />
When we love others, we are keeping the first commandment, that we love God. And when we love God, we can do that by showing our love to others. This is central. Jesus says it sums up the Law and the Prophets! In other words He's saying that <i>this is the underlying essence</i>. This is the key. Love.<br />
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So this spreads out to everything. <i>Everything</i>. He did it all for love. <u>This demands a re-estimation</u> of our understanding of what love really is. Because Jesus said there was no greater love than someone laying down their life for their friends. [John 15:13] Love is more than romance. It's greater than a feeling that fades. It's bigger than your fears and stronger than death. It is Him. It changes your life. It <i>transforms</i>. It renews. It gives life!<br />
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How do I convey the gravity of this? How can I show you all that I am learning? How can I help you understand? <i>This is so important</i>. This is the meaning. The reason... for all of it. He did it <i>all </i>for love. And I have so much yet to learn myself. His glory and His love. The purpose. His sovereignty. Our choices. The plan...<br />
<br />
This journey Somewhere is taking me down a path that points to love. It's renovating my heart, rewiring my mind. It is challenging me. Daring me to live my life out of this love. <i>To dare to love completely.</i> To live life wholly. And to live life in love, I must live it in Him. I know it sounds kind of mystical, and I'm trying my best to explain it. <i>He is life, </i>how can try to live without this Life who is Love?<br />
<br />
Ani lomedet. I am learning. Always learning...<br />
Learning to trust, lean, wait... Learning to love. To hope. To live. </div><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-1219731660644039312011-06-26T22:45:00.004-04:002015-09-24T19:35:22.254-04:00Signature Scent<br />
I have a confession to make...<br />
<br />
For the past several months I have been on a desperate search for my signature scent. Yeah, I bought into that whole idea of a personal, one and only, "wow-every-time-I-smell-this-I-think-of-you" scent. Allow me to attempt to justify myself for such a belief. Everybody knows that certain smells trigger certain memories. So it stands to reason that if someone smells a certain way all the time, then that smell will become associated with them, yes? Thus their signature scent.<br />
...<br />
That's it. Sorry, no mind-boggling, brilliant, philosophical notions on this one. Just always wanted to have a "Brittany" smell. A good one, preferably. I know some of you are probably thinking, "Uhm,<i> everyone</i> has a smell, Brittany." People will smell like their house or their laundry detergent or their body spray... even just their personal, inherent scent...or some combination of those. Right, but I seriously don't have one. No really. I know you can't smell yourself, so I've asked other people. "What do I smell like?" Big whiff. Pause. Pressing of my skin to their face, another big whiff. "Uh...nothing." Seriously.<br />
<br />
So! I wanted my own scent. And I'm picky. Super picky. Most perfumes, if you didn't know, have alcohol infused in them. It's for utility purposes and spraying and stuff. Well, that junk gives me headaches most of the time. Awesome. Conveniently I've been on this all natural kick for awhile, so I started researching natural perfumery. (I know, I'm a total nerd.) Anyway, there's a difference, still, between natural perfumery and organic perfumery. And even more of a difference if you go vegan. Yes. Vegan. People, this stuff can get expensive too! So, I looked through different websites, I traversed Etsy stores... but shopping online for something you simply must smell is pretty difficult. So, I ventured to buy only a few samples. Some were okay... at least, that's what I convinced myself. But not <i>me</i>. The search continued.<br />
<br />
Then I even began to consider scented lotions. I mean, after all, perfume (at least many natural ones) you have to dab on (because the essential oils don't spray without that added alcohol), and so the scent is kind of isolated. I'd spend quite a bit of time on the cosmetic aisle in the stores I went to...sniffing things. I came across a pretty nice, natural, shea moisture lotion that I enjoy quite a bit...and finally bought after coming back to it at three different stores. But it's still not my signature scent. (I know, I'm rambling... I have a point to this.)<br />
<br />
Last night I came across the closest thing I've found yet. Hah... I can't believe I'm actually writing about this. It's made by a natural perfumer in Italy. Get this, it's a French man who's converted to Sufi Islam. (Of course, right? I <i>would</i> pick the most random thing ever.) He's a perfume <i>composer</i>. For real. Well, after all the reviews I read, apparently the guy is a genius. Anyway, I was just browsing his site and came across a scent called <i>Tasneem</i>, the warrior poet. Loved the name. I kinda chuckled to myself and opened the page for more info. Loved the bottle. And, of course, it had all my favorite scents... almondy floral accent, vanilla, Egyptian jasmine...a subtle, muted sweet with an oriental (middle eastern) twist... Oh, and it cost <i>way</i> too much money. I knew I had a problem which I actually began to consider it.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<img src="http://i53.tinypic.com/ou5aah.png" height="127" width="220" /></div>
<br />
Don't worry, I got snapped out of it today. I know I was being silly. Lately, my focus on material things has been pretty shameful. Just preoccupied with too much <i>stuff</i>. I don't need anything. I mean, I need to pay off some student loans eventually, but I don't need another pair of jeans or some fancy luggage... All of this stuff is just so <i>temporary. </i>And today, I was reminded that I need to keep my eyes on "things above" and not on "earthly things". [Colossians 3:1-4]<br />
There's nothing wrong with wearing perfume. There's nothing wrong with nice clothes. Please don't misunderstand me. I splurge from time to time myself. It's fun to have a nice little sundress to wear. But I can't be thinking about those things <b>all</b> the time. They can't be my focus. Those temporary, material things don't even need to get <i>close</i> to that. I don't have enough time to live for the temporary. If I want to live for God, I need to focus on things that have eternal significance. I need to shape my life with love, style it with joy, mark it with peace...<br />
<br />
It's not my clothes that make me beautiful. <br />
It's a kind and gentle spirit. -[1 Peter 3:3-4]<br />
In 10 years it won't matter what I smelled like. <br />
I want my life to ooze God's love. I want it to permeate the air around me. To obey His voice, follow the Spirit, and let Him use me in such a way that people do a mental "double take" and wonder what just passed by. Not so that they'll think about me, or so I feel special... but so that it will<i> trigger</i> something inside of them. Something familiar. And remind them of Him. [Ecclesiastes 3:11] That it will touch that deep longing in them for something more...and maybe they'll recognize it's <i>Him </i>they're looking for<i>. </i><br />
Perfume? I'd rather be saturated with the fragrance of Christ and Life mentioned in 2 Corinthians 2:14.<br />
Let <i>that</i> be my signature scent.<br />
<br />Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-87421758550269476462011-04-28T22:28:00.009-04:002011-04-29T00:45:20.967-04:00Þú Ert Jörðin & Leaves of Gold<br><div style="text-align: right;">"I do not know how the great loving Father <br />
will bring out light at last, </div><div style="text-align: right;">but He knows, and He will do it."</div><div style="text-align: right;">-David Livingstone</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Long in waiting, I have no idea what I will write.</div><div style="text-align: left;">I only know that for a couple of weeks now, it's been pressing on me to write here again.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">On my desk sits a thousand things.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Old film and picture frames. Old books full of poetry.<br />
Most of it still unread.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Letters in a box overflowing.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Sunglasses from a distant land.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Notes. Timelines. CDs. Folders and calendars. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Wire, books, and string.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Rocks covered in salt from the Dead Sea.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Sand dollars. Sea shells. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Glass bottles full of notes for me.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Purple and pink flowers fading...</div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> This semester has been <i>something</i>. That's for sure. I guess this is what college is supposed to feel like? I have learned so much. And mostly from the two classes that I was completely dreading! Isn't that ironic? In fact, the teacher I feared the most at the beginning of the semester taught me the most. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> I was stretched. I was tried. I was poked and prodded and <i>challenged.</i> It was beautiful. Incredibly, annoyingly painful, but beautiful. <i>Beautiful</i>. That word carries such weight. Such marvelous weight of meaning! It's heady. It's potent... But I can't go there just now.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
-<i>mark momentary pondering, back-spacing and frustrated contemplation on the next move in this post...</i>-</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
A statement worth noting here that was mentioned this past semester is, "Human beings cannot live without poetry." That's a pretty bold statement. But I'm wondering more and more at how true it seems. We can't live without this <i>charged</i> form of language. There are just some things that we cannot describe in the form of prose properly. A sunset. The birth of a child. Falling in love... And even God. There are some parts of the Bible that we enjoy not only for it's instruction and importance or application, but because it's beautifully written. Because, as my professor says, "It's darn good poetry."<br />
I have so much yet to learn. And I'm wondering how I walked around before without knowing all the things I know now. It's interesting how enriched our lives become with heightened understanding. And it's not that I'm claiming to lay hold of truth. <i>It's laying hold of me</i>. I have to wrestle with it. And it's risky! Because it changes you. It touches something in the core of your being.<br />
Now <b>that's</b> something I've been learning this semester. Do you ever wonder... We sometimes hold God at arm's length. "Yes, I want to feel Your comfort and Your presence and Your love... but don't get too close! Whoa! Right there is quite close enough. Yes, that's close enough. Maybe scoot back a couple of inches... You're making me uncomfortable." Do you know what I'm talking about? Right. So, <i>why</i> do we do that? Why do we look into the face of perfect love and say, "Nah, too much of a good thing has to be bad for you."<br />
I think it's more than a fear of disappointment. After all, God has never given us a reason not to trust Him. I think it's a fear of what His love will <i>do</i> to us. Because, no doubt we <u>will</u> change. <b>You will be transformed.</b> How could you not be? How could your world not be utterly rocked when wrapped inside the arms of the God of the universe? "It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of a living God." (Hebrews 10:31). Are we not to consider such things carefully? Then abandon ourselves to it recklessly...<br />
Sounds radical, doesn't it? Faith. Surrender.<br />
But we fear change, I think. Could it be that we're afraid of what we could be? Or maybe what we'll never be... To truly wrestle with truth and beauty and reality and love... these things will mark us. The fight will leave us with a limp for the rest of our lives. But what if we limp away seeing the world differently? More clearly? More vibrantly? More <i>fully?</i> <br />
I will not pretend to have all of this figured out. That's the beauty of it too. The mystery. The pursuit. The chase. The constant knowing and seeking to know more. The moment, still and moving. And this isn't some unattainable meditative or super-ultra-spiritual state. It doesn't mean you're impossibly joyful or unearthly serene all of the time. It means <i>you're alive</i>.<br />
You know... those moments in the mundane. The monotony. Can you see it? The wind blowing the trees. The blue against the green. The feeling of the sun's warmth on your chilled fingers. The smell of food when you're hungry and about to eat. The feeling when you just finished something. The jingling of keys. The feeling of sitting after standing a long time... Do you know what I'm talking about? A true poet can see beauty in the most simple things. The hard and the plain things. In the real things.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> I have a lot of work ahead of me. And, at the moment, I don't really know what's going to happen. I'm moving forward, hoping that I'm going in the right direction. Hoping. Expectant. Waiting.<br />
You know, that place where you've done <i>everything</i> you can do... so now it's up to Him. And letting go can be so hard, because I still hold responsibility. I still have to try. I still have to run, trusting that He's guiding me. And life is crazy. Unexpected. Well, at least it is to me. To Him, well, He knows everything. That's why it's good to be holding onto His hand.</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: right;">"Let us, then, be up and doing,</div><div style="text-align: right;">With a heart for any fate;</div><div style="text-align: right;">Still achieving, still pursuing,</div><div style="text-align: right;">Learn to labor and to wait."</div><div style="text-align: right;">- Henry W. Longfellow</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-62955044200621893072011-02-18T00:36:00.001-04:002011-02-18T00:39:32.267-04:00Somewhat like an Epiphany<div style="text-align: left;">I'm sensing a shift in perspective.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Or maybe understanding or sight.</div><div style="text-align: left;">So staunchly before perceiving truth,</div><div style="text-align: left;">discerning what was right.</div><div style="text-align: left;">No lesser there do I grow</div><div style="text-align: left;">in my knowledge and understanding</div><div style="text-align: left;">(ever drawn and guided by the Word,</div><div style="text-align: left;">its Light therein).</div><div style="text-align: left;">But suddenly beauty bursts forth in everything.</div><div style="text-align: left;">And creation groans</div><div style="text-align: left;">for the revelation of the sons of God.</div><div style="text-align: left;">They seek the light,</div><div style="text-align: left;">but blind eyes knowing not where to look</div><div style="text-align: left;">(light gives heat,</div><div style="text-align: left;">turning their face toward,</div><div style="text-align: left;">hearts inclined)</div><div style="text-align: left;">they express their anguish</div><div style="text-align: left;">and their yearning</div><div style="text-align: left;">in book and song and rhyme.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Hiddeness and metaphor.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Beauty, depth and questioning</div><div style="text-align: left;">from inmost of the soul,</div><div style="text-align: left;">reflections of His endowed creativity.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>I am learning to see</i>.</div><div style="text-align: left;">To perceive Truth.</div><div style="text-align: left;">To not shoot down the world's expressions,</div><div style="text-align: left;">but to see them truly,</div><div style="text-align: left;">to their root.</div><div style="text-align: left;">To see their motivation and true question.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Intention. </div><div style="text-align: left;">And in that seeing, undisguised,</div><div style="text-align: left;">I do not condemn,</div><div style="text-align: left;">but have compassion on them</div><div style="text-align: left;">And here the Love of God is able to follow,</div><div style="text-align: left;">flow.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Perhaps a shift in understanding,</div><div style="text-align: left;">though here I lightly tread,</div><div style="text-align: left;">in seeing the world not as an enemy,</div><div style="text-align: left;">but as lost and broken instead.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Not as a theif bent to corrupt,</div><div style="text-align: left;">but corrupted by dark lies...</div><div style="text-align: left;">waiting to find Truth,</div><div style="text-align: left;">and know Love.</div><div style="text-align: left;">(At least their souls' intent,</div><div style="text-align: left;">though the heart knows it not.)<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">-Are we not to be light?- </div></div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-22491231235014836332011-01-23T17:30:00.002-04:002011-01-23T17:32:04.988-04:00"Futher Up, Further In..."<br>Can it already have been 23 days into the new year?<br />
This month has been like a whirlwind for me. Yet, though it now seems to have passed in a flash, its duration seems more along the lines of a few months instead of just around three weeks. (The paradox of time... or our perceptions of time...) Here's some stuff out of the overflow:<br />
<br />
I am back in America.<br />
Coming back here feels like trying to keep up on a major highway with a bicycle. Can I please go back to the picturesque, twisting country roads with little traffic and lots of time to ponder the world from my worn, comfortable old Schwinn bicycle seat? (That was a metaphor... I didn't have country roads to ride on, and my bike temporarily has a popped front tire.) <br />
<br />
It is so good to see old friends again. To spend time with them, to share the Word with them, to pour out truth and have truth poured in, to encourage, uplift, listen... To joke and laugh and play. To live. To be. You know what I'm talking about? Living life. Not surviving life. <i>Living</i> it.<br />
And I'm not talking about that "wild side" "living the life" stuff, either. I'm talking about the real stuff. The simple stuff. The stuff we miss sometimes if we're not looking up from our cell phones and computer screens.<br />
I'm talking about conversation. Relationship. Face-to-face, flesh and blood stuff.<br />
The "stop-in-your-tracks-and-gaze-in-awe-at-the-sunset" stuff.<br />
The learning you were wrong and it's okay stuff. <i><br />
Real life</i>.<br />
<br />
What a blessing to be alive!<br />
What a blessing to be able to go to classes that challenge me and sharpen my critical thinking skills. What a blessing to force myself out of bed, to push myself to learn and know more, to drive <i>toward</i>...<br />
<br />
Light falls across my keyboard and shoots a reflection through the the tumbler holding my tea. Piano music is streaming through the speakers. My Bible is close at hand. I have a paper to write. A couple of textbooks to read. Some Romantic poets to endure... And through it all, I'm just looking for those things God is trying to show me, to teach me. To make me more like Him.<br />
<br />
"For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and <i>asking God to fill you with the knowledge of His will</i> through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. We pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to His glorious riches so that you may have great endurance and patience and joyfully give thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light."<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">-[Colossians 1:9-12]</div><br />
"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom His whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and <i>to know this love that surpasses knowledge</i><i></i>--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God... I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace."<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">-[Ephesians 3:14-19, 4:1-3]</div><br />
"For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. <i>I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, <u>so that you may know Him better</u>.</i> I pray also that the eyes of your heart my be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints, and His incomparably great power for us who believe..."<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">-[Ephsians 1:15-19]</div><br />
Ah! There is so much more! You must read it! Sharpen your minds. He's so good! His plan of salvation and for the kingdom of heaven is so intricate and masterfully pieced together. How could we ask for more? What a beautiful mystery, this gospel of Jesus Christ!<br />
<br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-90480064940995891262010-12-31T17:06:00.002-04:002010-12-31T17:14:20.574-04:00Road Signs<i>If I may stop along the journey to reflect on the ways I've come...</i><br />
<br />
Do you know those moments? Those moments where you stop in wonder at where you've just come from, what has just happened... those moments where you <i>realize</i> and suddenly your breath is stolen away? Inspiration builds up in your chest, your heart beats a little faster... and you just <i>wish</i> you could write it all down, but there are not enough words; paint it out, but there are not enough colors; sing it in a melody, but your voice cannot reach all the notes?<br />
Ah! What a journey it's been! My fingers are far too clumsy to paint the picture with a song or a brush, even the stroke of a pen. Too much to tell! And do you know? It's not that my life is so much more extravagant or incredible. At least, not in the way you might expect at such a display. But I'm not overreacting. My God is so faithful! <br />
<br />
Road signs.<br />
A chief complaint of mine in this past year would most likely be, "I'm lost!" Anybody else relate? Not as in, I got in the car and I took a wrong turn. No, that's a perpetual state (it seems) that I've grown accustomed to. I'm talking about my spiritual walk. I'm talking about that feeling that everyone else around you seems to be going somewhere with confidence and direction, and they're all looking at you like you should be doing the same. <i>Especially</i> since it's you, you know. Of course, why not? It's <i>you</i>. But then you kind of look around like, "Uhm, what? <i>Me?</i> I--uh,... Did I miss something here?" So you kind of gather up your courage and stumble along, hoping to God you're going the right way.<br />
Can't relate? Oh. Well... Anyway, this year has been <i>packed</i> with lessons. Good grief! I remember talking to a friend who mentioned something that happened this past summer and I had to step back and think for a minute. It felt like it had happened <i>three years ago</i>. So much has happened this year. I have 200+ pages in my journal to prove it. That's not even counting a full little journal used only in Israel. And God has told me and promised me so many things. He is never late. I can see that now. I knew it, but now I can <i>see </i>it.<br />
<br />
Road signs.<br />
If you had asked me two months ago, I would have said I haven't had any recently. But it seems so impossible to say now. Even when I felt like I didn't have exact coordinates, He led me right where I needed to be. <i>How? </i>Surely by His grace, because it was certainly nothing I have done.<br />
Listen: <b><i>Never let hope die</i></b>, okay? Even when it seems impossible. God is in the business of doing the impossible. Did you know that an event that happens to but <u>one in a billion</u> people occurs <i>six</i> times a <u>day</u>? 2,000 times a year! You read that right. 1 in 1,000,000,000. NEVER give up hope. Especially in the things God has promised you. It's really not so impossible as it seems.<br />
But I would advise you in this: the Lord works in mysterious ways, yes? So who knows <i>how</i> or <i>what</i> will <u>exactly</u> come about in those things He has told you. He knows. Just know that if He told you, He will do it. Whatever that means. (Starting to see why I felt a little clueless this year? But suddenly, that's the "magic" of it! Suddenly, somehow, He's teaching me to read those road signs that, apparently, have been there all along.)<br />
<br />
June 4, 2010 -<br />
"<i>If I'm still breathing, I still have a mission</i>.<br />
It could be daring and adventurous in a thrilling, life-threatening way. Or it could be the noble and daring call of steadfast love towards a lost loved one.<br />
<i>Tomorrow (though non-existent as of yet) is another day</i>."<br />
<br />
March 21, 2010 -<br />
"What does the veil mean in a wedding?<br />
Is it to hide the bride or to hide the groom?<br />
The bride doesn't change, <i>but her view of the groom becomes more clear</i>. Perhaps so it is with Christ and the Church. One day, at the right time, just before Christ and His Bride are perfectly united, there will be an unveiling, and the Church will see the face of God more clearly than ever."<br />
<br />
May 8, 2010 -<br />
"Strange.<br />
Yet wonderful.<br />
My God is faithful. When I feel alone and sad, He reminds me He is near. He will never leave me nor forsake me. Even when I feel like I'm going crazy, when I just don't understand, my God is with me still. He never let's me go; never forsaking me, He remains my constant."<br />
<br />
June 9, 2010 -<br />
"<i>The sunrise was absolutely marvelous this morning.</i><br />
<i>Brightest pink I've ever seen from 30,000 feet."</i><br />
<br />
August 21, 2010 -<br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> "The girl who writes on the next page might not be the same girl who wrote on this one...</div><div style="text-align: left;">or perhaps a more realized version of her...</div><div style="text-align: left;">or a renewed and transformed one.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Tomorrow in Jerusalem!!"</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">November 13, 2010 - </div><div style="text-align: left;"> "I believe I have just discovered a secret.</div><div style="text-align: left;">I was pondering. Pondering the idea of will in salvation. Salvation is obviously an act of God. He is the Saviour. I am the "saviee", so to speak. Anyway, the idea of joy and duty and love crossed my mind.</div><div style="text-align: left;">It is not a joy to carry your cross daily? </div><div style="text-align: left;">It is a joy because His yoke is <i>easy</i>. His burden is <i>light</i>.</div><div style="text-align: left;">What a trick! The world has made it everything you don't want. The hardest thing. Foolishness. Suffering.</div><div style="text-align: left;">But all of that is fallacy.</div><div style="text-align: left;">It's life. It's freedom. It is the easiest burden.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Love. Joy. Forgiveness. Renewal. Transformation..."</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">December 7, 2010 -</div><div style="text-align: left;"> "Why shall I not be in want? <i>Because the <u>Lord</u> is my Shepherd.</i>"</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">December 17, 2010 -</div><div style="text-align: left;"> "Rest. Trust. Lean. Wait."</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
Flipping through some of the pages and reflecting on these last few months... I have only just now realized what a special time of rest this has been.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Time away.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Time alone in quiet.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Solitude & silence.</div><div style="text-align: left;">I'll cherish the last bits of it. I am thankful.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">A beautiful year. <i>Stunning</i>. I have learned <u>so</u> <u>much</u>. And still I learn... And all I can think is that these things are but a shadow of the things to come.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Oh! How great is our God!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">-=-</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img src="http://i52.tinypic.com/2s1ro2b.jpg" /></div><div style="text-align: center;">"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, </div><div style="text-align: center;">your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying: </div><div style="text-align: center;">'<i>This is the way; walk in it</i>.' </div><div style="text-align: center;">-[Isaiah 30:21]</div><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-52384399359292795822010-11-19T02:10:00.002-04:002010-11-19T02:14:55.162-04:001:52am<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lc3l52p4cF1qcgzw1o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lc3l52p4cF1qcgzw1o1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">[<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/waxowl/5180523116/">Jessica Whitaker</a>]</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
There are occasions in which comments come with perfect timing. Those times when you very least expect to hear them. When you weren't looking for them. When they come almost as if asking a question. "Did you know...?" Out of the blue.<br />
<br />
Someone says it and suddenly the questions in your mind are stilled. The anxiety and doubt you didn't even know were boiling beneath the surface are revealed and dispelled in a moment. You are encouraged. You are reminded.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">You are humbled.</div><br />
And did you know it was so simple? Did you know it would be so easy? So paradoxically uncomplicated. [(I love speaking in riddles.)] <i>Beautifully constructed</i>. Methodically orchestrated. With purpose and intent. Did you know it would be so simple as this? Just remember: Even closer.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>It's all hinged on this</i>.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Not me. Him.</div><br />
Praise God for His faithfulness.<br />
Praise Him for His patience and unending mercy.<br />
And glory to God, <i>this unconditional love!</i><br />
<br />
And I realize that I am still learning. Still growing. Still making mistakes. Still knowing. And it is in the <i>still</i>ness, when I let the waters quiet and become like a mirror, His reflection shows and I learn to move like He moves. <br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">[<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2046&version=NIV">Psalm 46:10</a>]</div><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-52541134032011267072010-10-27T09:43:00.005-04:002010-10-27T10:05:36.427-04:00The Coming of the Northern Winds...<br> A "skill" I've come to acquire during my time in the Dominican Republic is an acute sensitivity to the weather. Alright, so that's a little be exaggerated, but truly, I notice things that I never did before. Like what the winds are telling you. <br />
You can tell a storm is coming when the wind gets moody and anxious. It kind of rolls like waves on a seashore. The other day while I was out with my little brother he mentioned the trees. "Listen! Listen to them sway." And, indeed, the wind was making the trees bend and whisper together. But this wind was not like other winds. I feel like Autumn is approaching.<br />
Now, you must understand something. There is no Autumn here. There's no Fall or Winter seasons. We are much too close to the equator for any of that. However, there is a period of what we will call <i>Relent</i>. For about three months (or four, if you're lucky) of the year, there is a time when the winds change and it grows cooler. Cooler, not <i>cold</i>... especially not by any American standards of the word. But it is pleasant.<br />
Even now, a cool breeze comes in my room, breathing in the morning... <br />
<br />
Just after I got back from Israel I stayed at my grandfather's house and went on walks through his lovely neighborhood. I often prayed on these walks alone. It was during one of these that God revealed another little piece of Himself to me.<br />
I cannot tell you what I was thinking right at the moment that it all occurred to me. It wasn't by process of personal theological argument or rationalism that I came to this conclusion. I suppose there is a time and a place for those things. I am not condemning them. But I want to make the point that it wasn't because of anything <i>I did</i> that allows me to know Him. <b>He makes Himself known</b>. I just -- well, I happen to be there.<br />
While walking and thinking back on my experiences in Israel... somehow I come around to the topic of adventures. I love adventures. They are a sort of personal challenge on my courage and fortitude. (It's interesting to note that those things imply a <i>mental </i>or <i>spiritual</i> strength.) Anyway, it's also just plain fun.<br />
Like cave diving. What is it called? Spelunking? It's great!<br />
Or... like exploring a new city. Or taking on a problem as it comes at you. How do you <i>react? </i>Which way do you go? I know a lot of people don't like to get lost. However, I perpetually live in this state, it seems. For example, I was with a friend on their college campus. I knew I was in the United States, in a particular state, in a particular city, on that particular campus. Sure. I even knew where it was in relation to other cities. But could I get you back to where I just came from? No way. I could guess. I have a pretty good <i>sense</i> of direction. Maybe I just don't pay attention enough... But here's the thing: I don't get flustered when I get lost. It's kind of like, "Okay, there has to be another way. Now it's just finding it." An adventure.<br />
<br />
Time out: Let's not get crazy. If it was my wedding day and the driver can't find the church or something like that and I'm already late because - after growing up in an event-oriented instead of time-oriented latin culture - my hair appointment went over time, so I know everyone's waiting on me and I can't help the driver because I don't know where I am...? I'd be a little frustrated. That's when I'd pray and ask for directions. God forbid that ever happens. :)<br />
Moving on...<br />
<br />
I have a love for adventure.<br />
A love for the newness of things.<br />
The unexplored.<br />
And I remember on my walk being disappointed all of the sudden. I can't remember exactly why. Perhaps the idea of "nothing new under the sun" came to mind. Maybe a cynical, dreary thought crossed my consciousness: <i>Those are special cases. Cave diving. Visiting new lands... That's not what your life will actually <u>look</u></i><i> like.</i> Maybe it was the idea that everything or everyone could eventually be known and the mystery would be gone. I don't know what it was. But a sad feeling came over me.<br />
Suddenly, I looked up. Did I hear that right? Can it be true?<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: right;"><b>I Am your Adventure.</b></div><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> My heart began to flutter and my mind swirled with the thought.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> No matter how long I may search God or know Him, no matter how deep I go, I can still and forever go deeper. "<i><span data-jsid="text">We are tiny grains of sand on an eternal shore, the waves of the infinite ocean are falling, rushing towards, meeting us with the slightest kiss, then rushing back out to the unsearchable depths, begging us to be swept in and away. And a thousand miles in, we've only just begun to know...</span></i><span data-jsid="text">" -<a href="http://www.westbrookmurray.blogspot.com/">B.W. Murray</a></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span data-jsid="text">He is my constant.</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span data-jsid="text">And He is my <u>adventure</u>.</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"> God has forever been the same, but we are <i>just knowing</i> Who He is. That's the adventure. Our whole lives can be spent getting to know just parts of Him. Small parts. Each experience is an opportunity to learn something new. What is He trying to tell us? Not about us or for our own sakes. <i>What is He trying to tell us about Himself?</i> </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"> And do you know? That's what is so amazing about fellowship. When you get together with other people and begin to know them, they share some of those other revelations of God with you. They have other pieces to the puzzle. Time spent in fellowship with other believers buried in the Scriptures is as sweet to the soul as honey is to the tongue.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"> We seek and we find. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span data-jsid="text"> If I'm right, the season of Relent is coming. Perhaps in more ways than one... Who knows? God knows. All I know is: wherever He may be, I want to be there. <i>No matter where that is.</i> Why? Well... it's sure to be an adventure.</span></div><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-91774376564178493242010-10-21T18:38:00.004-04:002010-10-21T21:28:44.751-04:00Heroic Ages and Hundreds of Pages to Go...Has it already been almost a month since I've been back from Israel? <i>Really?</i><br />
<br />
As of late, I've been doing more reading than writing.<i> </i>I have random bouts of that it seems.<br />
I recently went to a yard sale and bought, oh, probably 8 books or so. A couple of novels, some philosophy, a history book or two. My biggest challenge is my Humanities textbook. Oh it's interesting... that's the problem. 599 pages bigger than my head, and I'll want to read and psychoanalyze every single one. As fascinated as I am with all of this faddle on the Heroic Age of ancient Greece... there's just no time for it. I have work to do. So much to do!<br />
But a wise friend once told me: "You don't have any more work than He has for you." And He has never given me anything I couldn't handle before... (Oh no, we're not getting into that whole lesson of time management again, are we?) <br />
<br />
I should write with purpose if I'm going to write at all. So why am I writing all of this? I never meant for this blog to be a sort of journal. Perhaps a collaboration of thoughts... Perhaps hints of inspiration. Certainly something that will at least get you thinking for a little while. Maybe all of this jumping around is due to my lack of writing as of late.<br />
<br />
I've also been reading an old blog of mine from a few years ago. I like to go through things like that from time to time. It's almost like visiting an old friend. Some of the things I wrote, the truths I understood and related with such conviction... is it possible to forget such things? My hope is that when those moments of understanding take place and then flutter away, that somehow they took root in my soul though they've left my present and immediate consciousness. That they are tucked away deep in my heart. Written. Carved into my very being. <br />
<br />
My last journal entry before I left for Israel says, "The girl who writes on the next page might not be the same girl who wrote on this one... or perhaps a more realized version of her... or a renewed and transformed one."<br />
I'm only hoping that happened. That something took root. Maybe I just have to water it (or let it be watered), and it will soon bloom into something.<br />
I don't <i>feel</i> any different, but it's not about <i>feelings </i>anyway, is it? I have never felt different. As years have gone by I have been <b>me</b>, though my understanding deepens and my knowledge grows. My essence remains.<br />
<br />
<img height="237" src="http://i55.tinypic.com/15fgojc.jpg" width="400" /><br />
<br />
I am beginning to feel like Israel wasn't the beginning or ending of anything. Though the sun set in the picture above, my last snapshot of the Holy Land, it hasn't set on this season. (Though this season is beginning to feel like a winter in the Arctic Circle. Or is it summer?) What I mean is, it seems to be a transition... or something. A shift of sorts. A realignment, maybe. I don't know yet. I'm still trying to figure it out.<br />
Because it's been a different kind of challenge. Not a struggle, not a breeze. It's like a meandering twist of unexpected turns rather than a horizontal movement. And I'm wondering how many pages I have to go in this chapter until it starts making sense.<br />
But oh, the paradox of me! How I love a mystery.<br />
<br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-53065932102531560632010-09-19T13:46:00.006-04:002010-10-22T10:30:01.250-04:00Over the Edge She began hiking up the rocky hill. Although it had been chilly that morning in Jerusalem, it had suddenly gotten hot and dry. After all, she had descended to nearly the lowest point on the planet. The group was scheduled to repel down the mountains of Qumran within view of the Dead Sea. She had already been to Qumran once, when they came to see (from afar) the caves where the Dead Sea Scrolls were found. Now she found herself climbing along those same hills. And, already, she was clinging to the rock wall side of the trail and not looking down. A little high.<br />
She's not afraid of heights. No, no. She simply <i>respects</i> them. After all, it's not the fall that kills you. It's the ground. It would be silly to be afraid of the ground, right? So she respects heights. They offer a great view. Too good a view to pass up.<br />
She was actually perfectly fine... that is until the guy started going over safety rules. Weird, huh? She pulled on the harness, a little nervous about its fitting, as she paid close attention to the instructions. <i>Wait a second, we are doing it one-handed? Friction? How does that even work?</i> He made it look so easy, but he was leaning at a 45 degree angle off a rock.<br />
The real fear started to come when she got close to the edge. It was a 130ft sheer drop to the unmerciful rocks below. "It's a 200% system. You have the harness and a safety rope. Nothing can happen to you." For some reason, this was not comforting as she thought about falling backwards over the edge... or, God forbid, slipping before any ropes were attached at all. During the rainy season, floods wash through Qumran, making the rocks smooth and even slippery.<br />
Her heart beat rapidly in her chest. It was her first time ever doing anything like this. Sure, she'd jumped off of like, maybe a 15ft cliff into water a couple of times. But this was <i>so much higher</i>. There seemed no room for error - even though they kept telling her she would be safe. She kept all of these things to herself. However, others voiced their opinion openly. They were scared. She admitted she was nervous too. The fear of the others was practically contagious... yet the reassurance of the more courageous were like a balm.<br />
<i>I can do this</i>. A strange peace settled over her as she encouraged a friend it was possible. They prayed for safety and steady feet. <i>It's going to be okay</i>. She certainly didn't want to leave the place not having tried.<br />
Her turn came. One of the leaders secured her line and told her to back toward the edge as he was on the phone. Up to this point, they were coaching people off the edge. "Spread your legs. Lean back. One step at a time. There you go. Good job. Straighten your knees." But now? Nothing. They were both on the phone. The phone! And she was about to lean over this cliff backwards?<br />
"Uhm... hey, is this right? Are my legs wide enough?" The man nodded quickly and waved his hand as a signal to continue. She took a few steps back. "Like this?" She leaned back, keeping a tight grip on the rope with her right hand, trying to get the feel of the weight and push-release effect. "Yeah, yeah, spread your legs a little wider. Go ahead."<br />
Slightly reassured, she worked her way down. <i>Concentrate. Get the feel of the rope. Trust it. Lean back. That's key. </i>Her lips trembled, but she began to enjoy herself. She even thought of jumping a bit, but was afraid to let the rope go too much and plummet too fast.. then panic. So she hopped a bit. Encouragement rang from below, "Yeah! Jump, Brittany!" She tried again and dropped a tiny bit. "I don't know how!" she laughed. <i>Okay, grab back further on the rope and push off.</i> Perfect! "Oh my gosh! This is the best!" She grew bolder and let the rope carry her down. The rush! More encouragement! Fear faded away in face of the sheer enjoyment and newness and victory. <i>She could do this!</i><br />
<br />
<img height="300" src="http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs685.snc4/62557_429900176694_638751694_5570701_3738096_n.jpg" width="500" /><br />
<br />
<img height="266" src="http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs603.snc4/58307_437930604319_528649319_4928717_4860088_n.jpg" width="450" /><br />
<br />
When she reached the bottom, she looked back up the cliff she just conquered. She could hardly believe it. She had come down <i>that</i>? What a beautiful picture it painted of faith and trust, courage versus fear...<br />
<br />
All that fear mounted up right before going over the edge. All of the <i>unnecessary fear</i> because, in reality, I was always going to be okay. I had nothing to worry about. Not only was the lifeline secure, I also had a safety rope. I just had to trust the rope and harness to do their work.<br />
Sometimes I let the task before me scare me. I let it make me nervous and I doubt my ability and the tools God has provided for me. Then I look around at other people's reactions and I feed off of them. I fed off the fear, and it seemed rational. <i>Wasn't </i>dangerous? I embraced the fear and fostered it. But then I remembered who my God was. I remembered that He cares for me. The guides were in place and the proper tools provided. I just had to trust the rope and go over the edge.<br />
Courage - action despite fear. Perception had altered my view of reality. I thought the task dangerous, impossible... <i>too big for me. Too high.</i> I had never done anything like it before. And yet when I went over the edge, I found out that it really wasn't so bad at all. In fact, it was fun! And I had a whole crowd cheering for me, believing in me.<br />
<br />
I know it might not really be that huge of a revelation for some. <i>It was just repelling down a mountain</i>. But for me, I think I learned a great lesson that can be relearned again and again. I know this entry was a bit long, but there's something important to understand here.<br />
God is certainly going to ask us to do crazy things. Scary things. Irrational things. Things that tempt us to fear...and even those around us make us think we <i>should</i> fear. It's only reasonable to fear. But <b>He always provides the tools necessary.</b> He never gives you something you can't handle. So trust Him and <u>step over the edge</u>. You might find it to be the time of your life! And the view is fantastic.<br />
<br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-76800610400208669932010-09-13T15:03:00.002-04:002010-09-13T15:10:18.565-04:00Yad Vashem - Holocaust Memorial<a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/69/Yad_Vashem_Hall_of_Names_by_David_Shankbone.jpg/800px-Yad_Vashem_Hall_of_Names_by_David_Shankbone.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/69/Yad_Vashem_Hall_of_Names_by_David_Shankbone.jpg/800px-Yad_Vashem_Hall_of_Names_by_David_Shankbone.jpg" width="500" /></a><br />
<br />
Let not mine heart be hardened,<br />
nor my compassion stilled.<br />
Yet I fear the knowing,<br />
my understanding filled.<br />
To let the pain seep so deep<br />
would rid me of my joy.<br />
Ripping raw my heartstrings,<br />
my peace it would destroy.<br />
<i>But no!</i><br />
Horror fills my lungs,<br />
Grief rips at my breast,<br />
Lament fills my throat,<br />
Saddness heavy on my chest.<br />
There is healing in this mourning,<br />
My whole heart aches to know,<br />
And as my eyes fill with tears<br />
My love begins to grow.<br />
My heart yearns their understanding,<br />
for eyes still blind to see.<br />
My soul burns to share the knowledge<br />
of Light and Hope in me.<br />
<br />
<br />
-=-<br />
<br />
<br />
Slow down for a moment and try to imagine.<br />
"We do not mourn as those who have no hope..." [1 Thess. 4:13]<br />
Yet still, we mourn.<br />
<i>Do not forget.</i> <br><br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-43559256361580022812010-09-08T08:27:00.005-04:002010-09-08T08:42:44.458-04:00Shana Tovah!<br> Today is Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year! They are beginning (counting from creation) the year 5771. Rosh Hashanah is all about reconciliation with your neighbor to start the year off right. If someone feels they have wronged their brother or friend, the will go repair the relationship. It's the first of the High Holidays - a ten day repentance period also known as the "Days of Awe" - that ends with Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. Rosh Hashanah is also noted for its memorial by shofar blowing.<br />
Everyone dresses up for dinner, and usually they wear white. I will be experiencing my first Rosh Hashanah dinner tonight. One thing on the menu will be apples and honey, symbolizing a sweet and fruitful new year. The pomegranate is also an important fruit here in Israel. It's made up of hundreds of seeds. The tradition is that it has as many seeds as laws in the Torah. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img height="266" src="http://www.chabadnewburypark.org/media/images/336/jGJU3360646.jpg" width="400" /></div><br />
Since Rosh Hashanah is observed as a day of rest, most shops closed up around 2pm today. There were tons of deals when my friends went out earlier as the shops are all having their "end of the year" sales. Though anticipation is in the air and everyone is greeting well wishes of a good year ("Shana Tovah"), there is a solemness about this holiday. It is more serious than festive, which really makes you think. It is amazing how reverent the people here are. Sabbath really is quiet, a true day of rest. The holidays are similar. Though, the Feast of Tabernacles is up and coming, a time of celebration. Perhaps I'll yet see dancing in the streets of Jerusalem...<br />
<br>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-31152666443557053622010-08-29T10:04:00.006-04:002010-10-22T10:28:06.730-04:00O Jerusalem, Jerusalem... Her fingers lightly brush across a column, unearthed nearly 2,000 years ago...<br />
The surroundings are not impressive. The space is about six feet wide, twenty feet long. There are large stones in the ground that serve as the road. She finds herself nearly twenty feet below "normal ground"... at least, that's as much as she can judge. The idea that ancient Israel is literally beneath her feet is a hard concept to grasp. Modern Israel is somewhere above her, though she's not underground. It's dank and smells a bit musty, but this is the City of David, on what used to be the main road leading to the "new" Jerusalem, near the pool of Shiloach. A pool, which, unfortunately, cannot be fully uncovered due to the property it is located under. There is a large mural on the wall which depicts what it could have looked like back in the first century AD. The tour guide, Hannah, explains a few details before they go see the real thing.<br />
As the smooth texture hits her fingers, her mind suddenly flashes back. An idea, a daydream of a possibility allows a smile to play on her lips. <i>It is possible, after all, that He did think of me here... knowing I would come one day and think of Him.</i><br />
They turn the corner and a wide excavation opens up before them, its characteristic stones baking in the hot middle eastern sun. It was here. This is where Jesus sent the blind man after He put mud on the man's eyes. An empty place only 1/4 excavated. No water, just debris. An earthen wall rising up where the Arabic garden stood in opposition, fencing off her view. What must it have been like? Stretching out, a smooth pool cool and refreshing. The wide steps lead down as she tried to picture the scene before her. Tried to imagine what the man must have felt like... dipping down in darkness and coming up to the light. What did he see first? The water? The people? The walls and the hills of Judea? The pillars? The sun?<br />
<div style="text-align: right;"><br />
<i>Did the very sight of <u>sight</u> steal his breath away?</i></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">-=- <i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> There is no possible way to describe to you what it is like here.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> The streets are not lined with gold, though they are sought after unto death nonetheless. The old walls are rough and rich with history. The country is indeed beautiful, but you would be surprised to know that those Judean hills were completely desolate just a century ago. Millions of trees have been planted since 1948.</div><div style="text-align: left;">It's not that it's magnificent or larger than life.<i> It's just life.</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"> Yet there is mystery here. There is something that draws all the world to turn their heads towards this little strip of land called Israel. It's been said that the center of the world is Israel. And indeed, in ancient times, it literally/geographically <i>was</i> the center of the world. And at its center was Jerusalem. At its center stood the Temple, and the center of the Temple was the Holy of Holies where God sat on the mercy seat of the Ark of the Covenant as Shekinah Glory.<i> </i>In the west they write from left to right. In the east they write from right to left. <b>Something</b> keeps pointing back to His land.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> There is no way to describe it to you. There's no way to explain its diversity, its complexity and its paradoxical simplicity. It's the ancient world wrapped inside the modern world. Somehow, here, they have managed to coexist - accomplishing the impossible.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">This is the place that <i>it all took place</i>.</div><div style="text-align: left;">How can I not stand here and be amazed?</div><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-9083386569609363052010-08-09T23:40:00.003-04:002010-08-09T23:56:21.612-04:00Here and Back Again<br>It's 11:11pm, my last night in Santo Domingo for a little while. My mom helped me pack my things and I'm bound for something incredible, extraordinary... unbelievable. <br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: right;"><i>I'm on my way to Israel.<br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: left;">Can you imagine? I'm left speechless. I'm left in awe. I don't know how to feel, how to react. All I can do is think, ponder and wonder what it will be like. What will <i>that</i> <b>feel</b> like? What will <i>this</i> <u>look like</u>?</div><div style="text-align: left;">I owe much gratitude to the friends who have helped me prepare for this journey and provided for me where I needed it. Whether financially or prayerfully. I needed both, and still appreciate the latter.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">What can I say?</div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm shocked that summer is already over. Where has the time gone? And yet I was so thankful to be home. So thankful for the rest. So grateful for the lessons learned. The support of my family and friends... </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">What shall I do?</div><div style="text-align: left;">My heart is ready to burst with expectation, my tears are ready to cascade over my cheeks in tiny bitter<u>sweet</u> streams... who am I to deserve such grace and favor? The honor of a call aligned with passion. <i>I've much work to do yet</i>. But the perspective change is finding joy in the hard work of a job well done. The work itself, not just the outcome, must become the joy, the drive.</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: right;"><i>Am I actually going? Really...?</i><br />
It still doesn't seem real yet. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">This summer was great. Three missions teams, youth camp, dog-sitting, babysitting, dancing in the rain, visits from old friends and a surprise visit from a friend who traveled across the planet for just 2 weeks home. I've laughed, delighted in stargazing, chased a giant crab out of the laundry room, been interviewed for a t.v. special, lost to my littlest brother in Scrabble - twice, finally had a Dominican fiesta with my youth group, dyed my hair auburn as a last minute model stand-in... gone to the movies, read, journaled, and been enlightened by God in so many ways. </div><div style="text-align: right;">[It's all part of that secret journey.]<br />
<b>What's next?</b></div><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i> </i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i> </i><span style="font-size: large;">בְּטַח אֶל־יְהוָה בְּכָל־לִבֶּךָ וְאֶל־בִּֽינָתְךָ אַל־תִּשָּׁעֵֽן׃</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">בְּכָל־דְּרָכֶיךָ דָעֵהוּ וְהוּא יְיַשֵּׁר אֹֽרְחֹתֶֽיךָ׃</span></div><div style="text-align: center;">-Proverbs 3:5-6</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Trust in the Lord with all your heart,</i></div><div style="text-align: center;">lean not<i> on your own understanding.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>In all your ways acknowledge Him,</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>and He shall direct your paths.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i> </i></div><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">He will not miss a step. Love always trusts. I'll take hold of His hand and let Him lead step by step. I know the tune, I can follow the melody. I have the musicality. <i>I love to dance</i>. Now all I must do is draw close, hold fast to Him, and let Him lead.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;">καὶ νῦν ἰδού, ἐγὼ δεδεμένος τῷ πνεύματι πορεύομαι εἰς Ἰερουσαλήμ τὰ ἐν αὐτῇ συναντήσοντά μοι μὴ εἰδώς </span></div><div style="text-align: center;">-Acts 20:22</div><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>And now, compelled by the Spirit, <br />
I am going to Jerusalem, <br />
not knowing what will happen to me there.</i></div><br />
Baruch atem ba'Shem Yeshua Ha'Mashiach!<br />
<i>This year in Jerusalem!!</i>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-55529633674684071092010-07-04T00:11:00.002-04:002010-07-04T00:20:31.792-04:00Breakthrough<div style="text-align: left;">You know, sometimes our victories do not seem very significant to onlookers. Do not let that deter your own joy. Nor let it stop you from rejoicing in the victories won by others, no matter how small.</div><br />
Some victories are those things we have done for the very first time. After all, you only have a First once in your life.<br />
<br />
Oh how I long to write, yet I cannot find the words to say. How I long to tell about what God is doing, yet I am reluctant to share the passings of my secret journey. I have learned, it seems, so much - yet to others it may appear to be very trivial. And you know, it might even seem obvious to some.<br />
<br />
Peace is not the eradication of uncertainty. Faith and peace coexist. Faith insinuates that there is still something to be hoped for because it has yet to happen. Yet peace is a stillness of the soul in the midst of storming circumstances.<br />
<br />
And oh! How I long to read. Yet, somehow the time escapes me. Time, time. Ever-present; ever-moving. We experience only a sliver of time while imagining the whole as past and future. We are promised nothing. God engulfs the whole of it and works outside of it and within it. He is not constrained, but is living and active.<br />
<br />
Complexity. Paradox. Mystery.<br />
Oh what a mighty God we serve.<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">It is like Michelangelo said, "I am still learning."<span class="RealName"><span class="fn n"><span class="given-name"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><span class="family-name" style="font-size: large;">אני לומדת</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: right;">And ever will I be. </div><br />
<img src="http://i47.tinypic.com/25rkxvs.jpg" /><br />
<br />
Did you know a seed must be buried and die before new life can breakthrough the surface of the soil?<br />
<br />
I planted those flowers with my Aunt Meg. I very much enjoyed getting my hands dirty with fertile earth. I do not need that plant, but it will not survive without water and sunshine and soil. If it is not taken care of it cannot grow. And the one thing it can accomplish is not much compared with what things much greater than it has done. Yet it serves best by being exactly what it was meant to be...and nothing more is expected of it. It must only be a flower. I did not mind reaching down and getting my hands dirty for that. <br />
<br />
I'd never seen so many singing colors at once before...<br />
Only in a rainbow. Only in a promise.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">But first, there was a breakthrough from darkness into the light.</div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-21007723574523147282010-05-18T10:54:00.002-04:002010-08-10T00:14:29.645-04:00Summery Thoughts and Vanilla Green TeaSummer has begun and I am quite enjoying the leisure time. It started off in the home of some family friends. I read four books in three days. It was great. Nothing was required of me, yet I still managed to finished what needed to be done. Amazing, no?<br />
<br />
Then I took a flight. Or more correctly, the plane was delayed for six hours...<br />
<div>and then I took a flight.</div><div><br />
And during this flight I met a few people. (Of course, what else do you do with six hours when you are stuck in a terminal with dozens of people stuck with you?) And, obviously, one of the topics was the delay. We all shared our opinions, most were quite upset about the delay. I don't exactly remember where the conversation led, but I do know I shared a certain idea and wondered why it wasn't implemented. A new friend said, "Well, some people don't think as logically as you do."</div><div><br />
I thought that was a funny comment.</div><div>I don't really think of myself as logical.</div><div><br />
Math is logic, right? I'm not terrible at math, but the way it functions really disagrees with me. I thought the word "cold" might fit, but that seems unfair. I have a great respect for those who can master the discipline of math. For me, it's seems I have a touch of C.S. Lewis' problem. When it comes to math, I can just as well as anybody add, subtract and multiply. I can set up an equation for you and understand the concepts... but for some odd reason I don't get the right answer. <i>But it's logical</i>.</div><div><br />
Sometimes when one of us kids would do something wrong or dangerous, etc., my dad sat us down and would ask why in the world we did what we did. It <i>didn't make sense</i>. It wasn't <span class="Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: underline;">logical</span>. Apparently by the age of seven, we develop the ability to "think logically". Whatever the heck that <i>exactly</i> means. Honestly, this stuff we call "knowledge" can be so terribly vague sometimes.</div><div><br />
I wonder if there is a certain distinction between being logical and being sensible. I might be more sensible than logical. Correct me if I'm wrong, are not logical decisions more based on what will end up being most efficient or something of the sort? Because being <i>efficient</i> makes the most sense...</div><div><br />
Okay, so who made up that rule?<br />
<br />
I understand that we must be good stewards of what is given us. But since when does that mean efficiency. Or, to be more specific, efficiency in the sense it is thought of it today. "Make the most of your money" and all that. Now, I hope you're not thinking what I'm trying to say is "Blow all your money! Who cares??" ((People have a tendency to believe that if you don't think or agree with one idea, you must think or agree with the complete opposite. For example, if a person says they don't agree with such and such republican candidate's ideas about this and that issue, people automatically assume this person is a democrat.)) My point is: I do think we should be good stewards (because eventually we'll have to give an account), but perhaps the idea of efficiency has been skewed. <br />
<br />
Is one efficient when they are able to gain more than they gave? Like, investing in stock and getting more money back. Or developing interest off your money. (How did this turn into a money issue anyway?) What I am really getting at is perhaps there are different ways to be efficient, <i>if</i> that's the key.<br />
<br />
Or maybe it's more about the experience. Maybe it's more about the journey than the destination. Maybe the journey is the destination. . . <br />
<br />
- <i>The writer then drifted off into a pondering mood...</i> </div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-87400824675919686332010-04-24T18:48:00.012-04:002010-05-03T21:09:15.572-04:00The 'Thin Places'<div style="text-align: left;">What if the Truth is there...</div><div><i>Right there in front of our faces...</i></div><div style="text-align: right;">just waiting to be known?</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">-=-</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 130%;">Genesis 1:6-8<br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: 130%;"><span class="Apple-style-span">וַיֹּאמֶר אֱלֹהִים יְהִי רָקִיעַ בְּתֹוךְ הַמָּיִם וִיהִי מַבְדִּיל בֵּין מַיִם לָמָֽיִם׃</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: 130%;"><span class="Apple-style-span">וַיַּעַשׂ אֱלֹהִים אֶת־הָרָקִיעַ וַיַּבְדֵּל בֵּין הַמַּיִם אֲשֶׁר מִתַּחַת לָרָקִיעַ וּבֵין הַמַּיִם אֲשֶׁר מֵעַל לָרָקִיעַ וַֽיְהִי־כֵֽן׃</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: 130%;"><span class="Apple-style-span">וַיִּקְרָא אֱלֹהִים לָֽרָקִיעַ שָׁמָיִם וַֽיְהִי־עֶרֶב וַֽיְהִי־</span><span class="Apple-style-span">בֹקֶר יֹום שֵׁנִֽי׃ פ</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><br />
</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">"And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters. And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so. And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day."</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms',arial,helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia,serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">-=-</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: medium;">מַיִם - (mayim) <i>dual of an unused singual -</i> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: medium;"><b>water</b></span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: medium;">שָׁמָיִם - (shamayim) <i>dual of an unused singual </i>- no definition; correponds to שָׁמָיִן (shamayin) meaning </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: medium;"><b>heaven</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: medium;">; also, (shawmeh) <i>from an unused root</i> meaning <i>to be lofty; </i>the <i>sky</i> (as <i>aloft</i>). The dual (shamayim) perhaps alluding to the visible arch in with the clouds move, as well as to the higher either where the celestial bodies revolve: -air, <i>heaven</i>. </span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">לָרָקִיעַ - (rawkeeah) from (raw-kah') a primitive root; to pound the earth (<b>as a sign of passion</b>); by analogy to <i>expand</i> (by hammering); by implication, to overlay (with <i>thin sheets</i> of metal):--beat, make broad, spread abroad (forth, over, out, into plates), stamp, stretch. - properly, <i>an expanse</i>, i.e. the <i>firmament</i> or (apparently) visible arch of the sky:--firmament.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: 100%;"><b>firmament</b> - <i>the vault of heaven</i>; sky. origin: 1250–1300; ME <>to strengthen, support ( see firm2 ) + -mentum -ment</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS';"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS';"><sub>(*definitions found from Strong's Exhaustive Concordance that I found today in an old Methodist Church thrift shop and dictionary.com)</sub></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'New Peninim MT','SBL Hebrew',Cardo,'Ezra SIL','TITUS Cyberbit Basic','Times New Roman','Arial Unicode MS'; font-size: 85%;"><span class="Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia,serif;">-=-</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Okay, so you may be thinking "Uhm, that's all a bunch of gobbledygook to me... what does it mean?" First of all, I can't take credit for the spark of this inspiration. All credit goes to my Hebrew professor, Dr. Zieman, who mentioned the relation of water to heaven in my lesson last Thursday during our overview of the new vocabulary.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Okay, so the initial thoughts before the Genesis reference, what am I saying?</div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm saying that there's a pretty good chance that we are missing some key information about heaven. And I'm also saying that I don't understand it all myself yet. The words water and heaven are very similar. And it is an expanse derived from a word that means to pound as a sign of passion? "The Spirit hovered over the waters..." Does that mean that at one point in creation, the makings of heaven and earth were combined? And He divided "the waters". I always thought this was sky and sea. Atmosphere and ocean. But heaven is the <span style="font-style: italic;">expanse between</span> these two? What does that mean? Where is it? Is it still connected?<br />
<br />
I find all of this so fascinating. I don't want to over-read the text. I simply want to take a fresh look at something that may have been overlooked many a time by myself and perhaps many others. Or if not overlooked, then misunderstood.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: right;">Though I could be wrong.<br />
It wouldn't be the first time.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">But it's okay to be wrong. You learn from that... most of the time. And I think it's okay to wonder. It's okay to wonder if maybe there's more to it... or less to it. And it's good to wonder what implications there might be...<br />
<br />
Hmm...<br />
<br />
I have learned from a very good professor that sometimes there is more to be taught by not giving an answer, but leaving the thinking and wondering to the audience. For those who truly wish to learn, motivation will spark a desire and willingness to research the idea for deeper understanding. And time is not lost on those who do not care for it.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">-=-</div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">"Earth's crammed with heaven, </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> And every common bush afire with God; </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> But only he who sees, takes off his shoes, </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries, </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> And daub their natural faces unaware..."</span><br />
<br />
<sub>- Elizabeth Barrett Browning's <span class="pCo">"Aurora Leigh"<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
</span></sub></div></div></div></div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-39307983161020471772010-03-03T22:33:00.009-04:002010-03-03T23:38:35.933-04:00Reflections of......<span style="font-style: italic;">a soul learning to fly</span>.<br /><br />Just another peek into what goes on inside of me.<br /><div style="text-align: left;">Because it's been awhile since I've sat down to write a blog on whatever may come to mind.<br /><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Something unedited</span><span style="font-style: italic;"> and unapologetic.<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">Growing up is not easy, but you can't expect to be spoon fed for the rest of your life. No one wants to live that way. Or if they do, I don't see how they could ever be content with that.<br /><br />I should probably, at this point, go ahead and warn you that this is not going to flow in a well-written, organized manner. If you don't see some sort of connection between one thought and the next, that's okay. It's probably because there isn't one. Or if there is, it was by distance relation to other ideas in between that went by too quickly to catch and put down in words. I wouldn't expect to get anything theologically profound in the next few sentences or paragraphs or phrases... whatever this may turn out to be. This is just a little therapy for me.<br /><div style="text-align: right;"><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /><img style="width: 400px; height: 309px;" src="http://www.calliebowdish.com/Birds/TreeSwallowLC4046Feb2007.jpg" /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">This is a Tree Swallow, from my understanding. Isn't it gorgeous? Look at that blue! That is the most marvelous blue... I saw about two dozen of them today while I was standing out on the dock before lunch. They were all sitting along the railing facing me, against the wind. I didn't want to disturb them. Well, that's alright because the wind started getting rough (nearly knocking <span style="font-style: italic;">me</span> over) and so they took to flight. They dipped and swooped and spun, ascended and dove and glided... it was beautiful. Carefree. <span style="font-style: italic;">Skilled</span>. I just loved watching them. They would get so close to the water they nearly touched it, yet they left enough room to flap their wings to rise higher again. Lovely. And there were so many! Not once did they collide, though they moved swiftly in what seemed zigzag, undetermined motions. Perhaps there's a dance to it...<br /><br />Do you ever wonder what people think about? Are they thinking about anything at all? Their schedule? What someone just said to them? The next thing they are going to say? Agenda? To-do list? That girl or that guy that looked their way? When they might get a chance to eat next and wondering if their favorite soup will be in today? Their current circumstances? Problems? Potential solutions? Are we always thinking about something or is it possible to not be thinking anything at all? You can still be thinking when you're not really thinking about thinking, can't you? Or perhaps it's just the brain is <span style="font-style: italic;">constantly</span> at work. Even when we're sleeping.<br /><br />Or how about what kinds of things people say throughout the day? Like when some people walk by and you catch just a snippet of the conversation their having, do you ever wonder what started that conversation or where it will lead? Or when you consciously hear that constant drum of noise in the cafeteria and you remember that, hey, those are actually people <span style="font-style: italic;">talking </span>about things. Usually all <span style="font-weight: bold;">different</span> things. You might have heard it said that women say speak several thousands or words a day while men speak almost less than half. Heard of a statistic like that? Actually, men and women speak about the same amount.<br /><br />So out of all those thousands and thousands of words that you speak a day (which just goes to show you the flexibility and creativity that is found in language that you can come up with completely new sentences everyday for the rest of your life...), out of all those spoken words <i>plus</i> all of those words that you <span style="font-weight: bold;">think</span> in a day... about how much of that is about God?<br />Okay.<br /><br />About how much of that is about <u>you</u> or <u>your</u> life or what <u>you</u> have to do? For that matter, how much do I think about <span style="font-style: italic;">me</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">my life</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">my </span>future? Right. Something needs to be done about that.<br /><br />You know, it's kind of nice that it's not all about me. Because if it's all about me, I don't know, that would almost be disappointing. Not because I'm a bad person or anything...<br /><div style="text-align: right;">But I'm so small.<br /><div style="text-align: left;">I would just have to wonder, <span style="font-style: italic;">isn't there more to all of this?</span><br />And if you really take a while to look around, to consider the stars and planets and galaxies that are quadrillions of times bigger than our <span style="font-style: italic;">sun</span>... and you take a moment to get outside of your own head and remember that there are other people around you, not only those you can see right next to you, but those that are across the world that you have never met and probably never will meet... and you look at the paradox of the complexity and simplicity of life on this planet... somehow you get this shrinking feeling, this humbling <span style="font-style: italic;">knowledge</span> that you just <span style="font-weight: bold;">know</span> it can't be all about you.<br /><br />It's not.<br /><br />We waste so much time. <span style="font-style: italic;">So</span> much time.<br />If you get the suggested amount of sleep -- 8 hours -- every night... you sleep one third of you life away. <span style="font-style: italic;">And that's actually good for you</span>. Really? A third of it! Gone!<br /><br />Listen, I've been thinking.<br />You may feel like you don't have a lot of time on your hands, and you're probably right. But the good thing is, we can multitask. How about this idea: there are parts of my job that I feel like I could do blindfolded backwards while standing on my head. It's not that it's super easy, it's just tedious and repetitive. What if I used that time to pray unceasingly? I would get four hours or work <span style="font-style: italic;">and</span> prayer in a day. That's one fourth of the 16 hours that I'm awake. I, personally, am going to try and use my "half hours" more purposefully as well. There are things I need to do and get done. Can't I do them in my "in-betweens"? If I'm going to sleep about a third of my life anyway, I might as well be good and tired when I do it, right?<br /><br />Our lives are but a vapor.<br />A blink of an eye.<br />Quick.<br /><br />But count your life by love lavished instead of seconds spent.<br />It's a lot more motivating.<br /><br /></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-62820467893447520002010-01-09T23:30:00.004-04:002010-01-10T00:01:58.370-04:00The Wonders of Pondering...<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTrw4EP2b86BusPBYq-HysiH3B-bUbVd17PykxpuvFS_HT-8WJgZ5lTXU1DFt1q8Erx14L19UOrTWMawsvBAisQ4a9i88A3UsK-zbfa3vmHK6wRXO9ZiO5ysfCvUw11t1dmsHEmdUu06Wy/s1600-h/books.png"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 218px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTrw4EP2b86BusPBYq-HysiH3B-bUbVd17PykxpuvFS_HT-8WJgZ5lTXU1DFt1q8Erx14L19UOrTWMawsvBAisQ4a9i88A3UsK-zbfa3vmHK6wRXO9ZiO5ysfCvUw11t1dmsHEmdUu06Wy/s400/books.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424948636223157698" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Have you ever read a book with someone?<br />I remember one of my favorite childhood memories was when my dad would read to me just before bed. I know you see that in movies and stuff, but how many dads actually do that? And how many dads--if they do that--read a fantastic book like <span style="font-style: italic;">The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe</span>?<br /><br />I can remember the beginning of my reading career. It was in kindergarten. My dad had come in one day and we were supposed to all be reading to our parents or something. Anyway, I was sitting in his lap and I remember faking it. I didn't want to try so hard. I didn't want to look silly in front of someone so smart, someone I admired and loved. So I would look at the pictures, make up my own words (from what I remembered of the story) and turned the page "before" he would get a chance to look at the real words.<br /><br />But I admired him with reason. He was smarter than I.<br />"Britt," he said while turning back to the previous page, "how about reading this word to me again." He pointed at one of the various words on the page. I stared at him blankly, wondering how he had figured out my clever trick. Thus it began<span style="font-style: italic;">. Slowly, e</span>ven painfully at times. Now I can't get enough. And recently, it's been with one or a couple of others.<br /><br />For example, a few months ago my friends and I decided to begin reading a book together called <span style="font-style: italic;">Before You Meet Your Prince Charming</span>. Maybe it sounds cliche, but it's really very challenging. It's neat to see reactions, hear different perspectives, clarify and delve into... We're picking it apart piece by piece, weighing it against our different experiences and what we know as Truth. We keep a journal to track our progress along the way.<br /><br />And today I was reading <span style="font-style: italic;">Crazy Love</span> with my mom. Another very challenging book, but a very good read if you're willing to apply what you learn. We'll finish tomorrow before I leave for school again. We did mani-pedi's tonight. :)<br /><br />I love my family very much. I thank God for what He has blessed me with, and I look forward to seeing them again this summer (which seems to be getting busier and busier). I don't want to wish any time away, or even to ask it to move swiftly. That would be foolish. I need this time to learn some things. I don't even ask that it would be easy. Only that God would be right by my side through it all, guiding me and guarding me.<br /><br />This year I will learn.<br />This year I will train.<br /><br />It's time to get ready.<br />Right now is preparation for a time soon to come.<br />Acercate, mi Dios.Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-89265090356345379272009-12-31T00:17:00.004-04:002009-12-31T00:37:05.007-04:00Thank You, Lord...<sup>O my soul, rejoice!</sup><br /><br />As I look back through my prayer journal for the year 2009 I can the see the mark of God's faithfulness over and over again. He has been with me every step of the way. He never left my side. <span style="font-style: italic;">And I am thankful</span>... you can see it splashed most every page.<br /><br />In this year 2009, what have I learned?<br />I will take an excerpt from one of my prayers this summer:<br /><br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">forgive</span>; You forgave me.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">let go</span>; You're in control.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">believe</span>; You are <span style="font-weight: bold;">trustworthy</span>.<br />I will be <span style="font-style: italic;">patient</span>; it is a virtue and pleasing to You.<br />I will have <span style="font-style: italic;">joy</span>, for <span style="font-weight: bold;">You are my salvation</span>.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">remain</span>; You will never let me go.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">persevere</span>, for you have promised a crown of life.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">trust</span>; You are <u>faithful</u>.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">sing</span>; You sing over me.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">be still</span>; <span style="font-weight: bold;">You are God</span>.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">pray</span>, for You hear me.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">glorify</span>; You are King.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">please</span>; for it is my deepest desire.<br />I will <span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-style: italic;">walk confidently</span></span> in my steps; You have told me so.<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">love</span>; <u>You have loved me first</u>.<br /><br />Any more to add?<br />I will <span style="font-style: italic;">dance before You</span> just like King David, for he was a man after Your own heart. I will <span style="font-style: italic;">wait on You</span> and not waste this time; what You offer is worth waiting for. I will <span style="font-style: italic;">rejoice always</span>; <u>You have brought me to life</u>. I will live <span style="font-style: italic;">free</span>, for who the Son sets free is free indeed. And above all: I will <span style="font-style: italic;">focus</span> on my relationship with You, for that is all that matters. May this vapor of a life be a glorifying flash of light for the One who made me.<br /><br />Thank You for an amazing year, Lord.<br />Do Your will in the next.<br /><br />I love You, Abba.Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5958545785133239230.post-5826794836835199842009-12-30T12:30:00.004-04:002009-12-30T23:56:44.400-04:00One After Another...<div style="text-align: center;"><sub>Two devotionals that spoke into my life.</sub><br /><sub>--By Darlene Sala--</sub><br /></div><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />God and My To-Do List</span><br /><br />What do you have written on your to-do list for today? Will you get it all done? Will God feel let down if you don't?<br />Many of us feel God is disappointed in us if we don't accomplish all we hope. Somehow we must feel that if we could just get it all done, we'd sense His smile of approval. We feel guilty when at the end of some days not even one item on the list is crossed off, because the day just didn't go like we planned. And we figure God must be pretty disappointed with us, too.<br />But Jesus did not come to earth to help us get more done. He came to make it possible through His life and death and resurrection for us to have a personal relationship with God. Not just "fire insurance" to keep us out of hell, but day-to-day walking and talking together.<br />I like the phrase "the fellowship of the Holy Spirit" used in 2 Corinthians 13:14. God the Holy Spirit lives within us, and that means we can have fellowship with Him through His Spirit. That means we can sense His presence right where we are in the middle of our circumstances.<br />It is not enough to organize your life so that you get the most important things done first--unless the very first thing on your list is your relationship with God. It's not enough to learn to win friends and influence people, as good as that is, unless the #1 Friend in your life is Jesus. It's not enough to learn to think positively unless your thoughts throughout the day center on God.<br />God's love is neither increased nor diminished by the success of failure of your to-do list. Instead He wants your first concern to be how you can fellowship with Him on a closer, warmer, and more personal level, no matter how efficient and organized--or inefficient and chaotic--your life may be.<br />When you have that sort of relationship, you can trust your to-do list to Him. He knows better than you what you really need to accomplish.<br /><br />["<span style="font-style: italic;">It's all hinged on your relationship with God.</span>"]<br /><br />-=-=-=-=-<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Wait</span><br /><br />The psalmist urges us:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">"<span style="font-style: italic;">Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.</span>"<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Over and over the Bible repeats these words: "Wait for the Lord." Wait for God to act. Wait for Him to do what no one else can do in your situation. This kind of waiting doesn't mean drumming your fingers on the table while you accuse God of being slow. Instead, it means you take courage--you take heart--because all the time you're waiting, in your heart-of-hearts you truly believe He will act in time.<br />"God is seldom early, but His is never late," says my husband. In fact, they'll probably chisel it on his tombstone someday because he not only says it, he lives it. Yes, the God who invented time will answer before it's too late.<br />Evangelist Dwight L. Moody had a brother who was an unbeliever. For forty years Moody prayed that his brother would turn to the Lord. But he never saw it happen, for Dwight L. Moody died still waiting for his brother to come to Christ. What Moody never learned on earth, however, was that after his death, his brother did come to a saving knowledge of Christ. God did answer Moody's prayers. The God who said, "Wait for the Lord," was faithful to answer.<br />The circumstances of your life may look like a tangled mess of threads instead of a beautiful tapestry. Put God in charge and wait for Him to act. Nothing is impossible with Him.<br />Hannah Whitall Smith wrote, "<span style="font-style: italic;">It is not hard...to trust the management of the universe, and all of the outward creation, to the Lord. Can your case then be so much more complex and difficult than these that you need be anxious or troubled about His management of you?</span>"<br />Yes, God wants to be the manager of your life. Think about that next time you look up into the sky and see the heavenly bodies that God keeps going in their precise orbits. Think about it when you watch the Discovery Channel of TV and marvel at the intricacies of the cycles of life that God sustains on this earth.<br />If God can manage the universe with such skill and care, I suspect He can handle your life's pressures and challenges as well.<br /><br />["<span style="font-style: italic;">The Lord knows when a sparrow falls from the sky. Are you not more valuable than these? Be anxious for nothing. Do not worry. Be not afraid...</span>"]<br /><br />--<br /><sup>Devotions from "Encouraging Words for Women" by Darlene Sala</sup><br /></div></div>Brittany.http://www.blogger.com/profile/12532620013471108801noreply@blogger.com0